


Time's out

by Yda



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Adam is a cutie, Fluff, M/M, No Spoilers, Ronan Swears, Ronan is an anwkward dork
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-29
Updated: 2016-04-29
Packaged: 2018-06-05 07:53:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6696223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yda/pseuds/Yda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chill. As if it was that simple. Ronan needed to punch something. He needed to punch something or he would smile.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Time's out

   
          Fucked up. He was so fucked up he needed Gasoline. He couldn't sleep, he couldn't dream. Everything was just nightmares. It was useless, useless to even try, so he found himself in his gray baby, driving faster than usual. He didn't even remember what usual used to be. He didn't even know where he was going, he just wanted speed. Adrenaline. To shut his mind. Turning up the volume would help, too. He rolled the windows down. Now the night was spitting warmth he couldn't afford in his lungs nor veins anymore. As if she was taking revenge, because he was disturbing her quiet with his roaring engine and his speakers screaming bass waves. Ronan grinned. Destroying peace. Forcing the night to fit his state of mind. He liked it. He pressed down the speed pedal to the pulse of bass. As if it was the car's heart. Spitting gasoline. This smell. It would drive him crazy. Gasoline, gasoline, gasoline, gasoline.

          Chainsaw bit his ear violently, interrupting his thoughts, forcing him to slow down roughly. Ronan was skilled enough to control the skid, as sharp as it was, and the BMW rudely ended on the side of the road. Quiet. Immobile. Rain was now beating on and in the car, coldering his skin even if it didn't need to. Gasoline's scent was leaving for the fresh rain one. He sighed, but he wasn't angry at all. His heart was still racing. He turned down the music. Maybe he had driven too fast. Once more. Chainsaw was good at keeping him safe. He gently pet his head. Maybe Noah was right, too. He shouldn't stay alone when he was like that. He sighed, again. Gansey was sleeping, for once. Noah was erased, as often. Adam was certainly studying, as always. Chainsaw rubbed her dark feathers against his shaved skull before singing a little _Kerah_. Ronan smirked. Both his hands grabbed stick and wheel, and the car roared again. It was 1a.m. and Parrish would certainly need his ass kicked to go to sleep.

 

 

          Ronan shut down the sweet purring engine. He walked to Adam's door nonchalantly and knocked-not-so-heavily. Maybe he was sleeping, finally. But soon, Parrish's face appeared through the door.

"Hey", he said in a low voice.

          Adam disappeared quikcly in the shadow of his little appartment, letting Ronan in. He had already returned to his books on his desk.

"God Parrish, for once stop working and go to sleep." sighed Ronan.  
"I haven't finished the essay yet."  
"You'll finish tomorrow. It's fucking 1a.m."  
"Yeah, it's fucking 1a.m. and you came because you couldn't sleep either."  
"No. _I_ can't. But _you_ can. Seriously did you see your dark circles. You're as pale as Noah. You're a fucking panda, Parrish."

          Adam couldn't help but give a tired smirk.

"An hour more. Then I'll stop."  
"I give you a half."  
"You usually come later."  
"A half. And if you're not efficient enough, I make you fly to your bed with a kick in your ass."

          They said nothing more. Adam hadn't enough energy to fight this stuborn shaved head this night. Ronan sat against a wall next to Adam's desk. It was always the same thing : Parrish tried to work more and more, but ended sleeping on his books without having really worked in the last hour at least due to his exhaustion. He was right, though. Ronan usually came at 2 or 3a.m., but he wouldn't wait til then this time, because Adam seemed too close to his limits. At least, more than usual.

           So Ronan waited. He was facing Adam's left side. He unconsciously began to chew his leathered wrist, petting Chainsaw's head with his other hand. He tried not to stare too hard at Parrish's shitty tired face but, well. Sometimes it doesn't work as you want it to, right ? He liked to study his lines, though, even if he already knew them. Adam's eyes were fighting so much to stay open, it was even tiring Ronan out. He sighed and stood up.

"Time's out, Parrish."  
"It has only been ten minutes.", Adam answered in a lazy and soft voice, all the opposite of Ronan's.  
"You're as efficient as me actually. So, go to bed. Now."  
"I. Have. To finish." articulated Adam, trying not to sound as annoyed as he was. But he did.  
"No. You have to fucking sleep now."

          Ronan tried to close his books but Adam pushed him away and stoop up violently.

"Fuck you Ronan, I have to fucking work, I want-"  
"Parrish."  
"to graduate, I want to-"  
"Parrish."

          He didn't want to listen nor stop spitting all his self doubting shit so Ronan raised his voice.

"PARRISH", he ordened gripping the other's shoulders. "Breathe. You're hyperventilating. I said _breathe_. Shut up and listen to me for once. You're tired. You can't work. You're losing time for both working _and_ sleeping. So now, you shut the fuck up and go to bed you fucking asmathic panda. Tell something more and you won't be part of the rescue plan of your fucking specie and I'll be pursued by WWF."

          Adam just closed tiredly his eyes. He slowly sighed, letting his arms fall from Ronan's chest. He knew Ronan was right. He was just. Exhausted. Tired to be weak. To work so much to compensate his lack of money. To not be able to push himself from his shitty roots. He let his head fall on Ronan's shoulder. Tired to be tired. Tired, tired, tired, tired, tired.

"Relax. Breathe." Ronan said as neutral as possible. Which was not at all.

          He didn't know if it was for Parrish or himself. Because right here, right now, with Parrish's fucking face on his fucking shoulder, he was not ok at all.

"I'm not a fucking pillow, Parrish." He growled.  
"Chainsaw seems to disagree", muttered Adam. "Just... ten seconds. Please." he finally asked after a pause.

          Ronan didn't answer so it meant he would wait for Adam to calm down. If you didn't know him, you could think he was as quiet as he asked Parrish to be. But the truth was he wasn't at all. He was tensed up from his shoulders to his spine, fixing the wall in front of him, trying not to look at Adam, his arms trailing down his body.

          And his senses weren't helping him. He could perceive the scent of Parrish' shampoo, something soft and hazy, comforting and strangely natural, which reminded him all those little green bottles piled in supermarkets claiming "fresh pine tree" that he had always mocked, asking if they had put a fucking "fresh pine tree" in one of those bottles and how many time it needed to not be fresh anymore. It was half covered by something a lot more harsh and chemical, evoking Adam's mechanical job, like leather and metal, jeans and dust, oil and _gasoline_. It felt like Cabeswater and the Pig. Dreaming and racing. Adrenaline and comfort.

"Chill." He breathed.

          Ronan eyebrows raised up. It wasn't his voice. It was Adam's. His cold as blades eyes stared at the curl-haired boy.

" _I am_ ", he muttered sharply.

          Adam snorted slightly, looking at Ronan's mouth who was unconsciously and heavily chewing his leather bracelet. As an answer, Adam's hand softly caught Ronan's wrist to stop him from destroying it, and above all to show him he had _noticed_ unlike him. Ronan frowned before letting his hand fall. He didn't like it at all when his weakness was perceived and used against him. He felt relieved when Adam's head stood up. Less scents. More emptiness. His shoulders relaxed a little, but his jaw tensed up immediatly when he felt a finger running down his arm.

"Parrish."

          He was definitely making fun of him. Parrish was showing him he had noted his tension through his fists. _Asshole_.

"Thought you were calm", Adam said.  
" _I am_."  
"Yeah. Seems so", Adam answered, raising an eyebrow, now catching Ronan's fist as if he needed to show what his proofs were.  
"Fuck off Parrish. Go to bed." Ronan grumbled while fixing anything to his left but Adam's face.  
"Look at me."  
"'Gonna kill a fucking panda tonight." Ronan threatened agressively.  
"Look at me", Adam repeated. "You're usually good at it, aren't you ?"

          Ronan's sharp as hell gaze fixed Adam's eyes. He didn't like what he had just heard. Adam was definitely mocking and defying him and he wouldn't lose. Now Parrish had a little smile on his tired face. He was satisfied because he knew his provocation had worked as he wanted to. _Congrats, he definitely noticed. Fuck off Parrish. Fuck off._ And now his hand was trying to undo Ronan's fist.

" _Parrish_."

          Ronan now felt angry. This, and only this, was why his heart was accelerating. He didn't fear at all to be discovered. He couldn't be, in any case. He had always been discreet enough. Nobody _knew_. Adam was just pissing him off, trying to show him he was cooler than him. _Cooler my ass_. But now another hand was on his neck.

"Parrish", He repeated louder in case he hadn't _heard_. " _Go sleep_."

          Adam smirked, as if he was mocking his lack of retort - _fuck you Parrish_ , and he leaned to shorten the distance between them.

" _Adam_."

          And Adam was now kissing him. _Holy fucking shit. Adam_ was _fucking kissing him_. Ronan was definitely reviewing his definition of the _stress_ word. Maybe the right expression right now was _panick attack_ or _screaming internally_ or _dying_ or _dreaming_. Yeah. It certainly would be something like that. He needed a pinch to wake him up because these days with all those technologies dreams seemed _really fucking true_. Yeah. But no. Adam's free hand was now running through his skull. A pinch wouldn't be sufficient finally. He needed _a fucking punch in his face_ at this level. Chainsaw bit his ear hard. _Jesus fucking Christ thank you_.

          Ronan opened a little his eyes but **_no_**. Adam fucking pretty Parrish's face was still kissing him, eyes closed and cheeks blushing. _Jesus fucking Christ not thank you._ Ronan used to like adrenaline but actually he thought he had _maybe too much of this shit in his fucking veins_. Or his blood was running too fast with his fucking heart racing like that. He couldn't _think_ properly.

          Adam interrupted slowly their kiss to look at him. Ronan's eyes were flickering from his pretty blue eyes and long blond eyelashes to his _not attractive at all_ mouth. His mind was just full of _what the fucking hell what's fucking happening here._

"Chill", was all Adam softly whispered.  
" _Are you fucking kidding me_ ", grunted Ronan.

          Chill. _As if it was that simple_. Adam just shyly smiled _-as if it was fucking helping, god damnit-_ before kissing him _again_. Ronan needed to punch something. He needed to punch something or he would smile. _Seriously how do you deal with emotions_. And as if it wasn't enough, the mouth's party was joined by _tongues. Ho. Ly. Shit. Please, need an instructions book to calm down, gonna kill someone._ His knuckles were certainly whiter than Noah's ass. Adam caught his hands to undo his fists. Ronan thought he would have to learn more insults to swear because apparently this kind of situation needed _a shit-ton more_.

          Adam was about to stop kissing him again, but Ronan's hand gently pulled his neck, the other running through his hair.  _Maybe_ he finally didn't want to stop. _Maybe_ he liked it. And him. _A damn lot_. Adam smiled against him and he didn't need to be asked twice, cupping Ronan's face with his own hands. Their lips met again and again, their fingers beginning to explore other parts through their shirts but Ronan softly broke for air. They kept silent for a moment, both forehead against the other's, eyes closed. Or semi-closed because Ronan couldn't help but stare at Parrish's mouth. His thumb traced fondly Adam's lips stretched into a soft smile. Ronan finally recovered his voice.

"God damnit Adam. You should be sleeping now", he mumbled.

          Adam grinned because Ronan had momentarily lost his poisoned tongue. He was dark but his heart was gold. Adam liked him. A damn lot. He leaned to hide his face in Ronan's neck and his left arm reached the other's hip while his free hand just touched his shaved head.

"Ronan ?" he finally whispered.  
"Hmm", he was intenting to deal with all these... things.  
"Could you... stay, and, sleep with me ? Please ?"

          Maybe he was trying to kill him finally.

"...'Kay."

          Ronan didn't even think about keeping some dignity. He knew he couldn't because of this dumbass. Adam slowly smiled before standing up again. He turned off the desk light before leaning on his little bed. Ronan silently followed him, fists in his jean's pockets, his gaze more unsure than usual. But it seemed usual didn't mean anything anymore these days. Adam lied down on his bed, Ronan sat next to him without a word, heart still racing, trying to look indifferent. But it was clearly a failure as he met shy, tired, happy but lacking self-esteem Adam's gaze.

"What", he asked.  
"Nothing, just. Happy, I guess. To not mess this up, at least."  
"Can't you just stop depreciating yourself for once", Ronan sighed. "You're not messed up Adam."

          Adam smiled tiredly.

"You soothe me", he finally confessed in a low voice, playing softly with his own fingers.

          He could read surprise in Ronan's blue eyes, neutral at first sight.

"Quite ironical. I'm more _sanguine_ than calming."

          Adam shruged and grinned smoothly as an answer. Ronan was mocking him to hide the fact that he was troubled.

"You won't sleep ?" Adam asked softly.

          Ronan hesitated, staring at him. He guessed what he wanted. He gently put Chainsaw on the bed's edge and lied down next to Adam, an arm under his head.

"You calm me down, too, though." Ronan finally admitted. He looked at Adam's clock to avoid his gaze. "Anyway. It's 1:30. Time's out. Come on."

          He opened his arms slightly. Adam smooched him before curling himself against his chest and Ronan blessed the dark for hiding his blushing cheeks and screamed internally because all those sweet effluvia were invading him again.

"Thank you, Ronan. Good night", Adam breathed.  
" 'Night."

          Adam hugged him fondly and hid his face in Ronan's neck. He was able to soothe Adam. He didn't know how. But he did. Ronan pulled the blanket on Adam's shoulders. He finally slipped a hand in his curly hair and rolled his free arm around his waist. Pine tree and gasoline. Cabeswater and the Pig. Adrenaline and comfort. He felt maybe he could sleep tonight. It felt new. It felt warm.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I have to wait for the Raven King so, I write instead. Also I can't write serious things it seems. Whoopsie ! And thanks to arigashit for beta-reading it owo


End file.
